OMG Breakups ARE HARD! Everyone who has ever experienced heartbreak knows the devastating pain that comes with losing the person you love. But why is it so hard to move on? This post will help you understand, why the pain you feel after a breakup is normal and why breakups are hard, especially for a high-value woman like you.
This post is all about breakups are hard.
Losing the person you have invested your time, love, and energy in, isn’t something that anyone wants to have to experience. However, it is part of our lives and only the most lucky ones amongst us never have to endure this overwhelming sadness and numbness after a breakup. Even the person who decides to leave often says: “I ended the relationship but it still hurts”. But why is it so hard for us to move on? Why is it so devastating, especially for high-value women? Here are 5 reasons why.
Breakups are hard
1. We are emotional beings
Part of our human experience is feeling and living emotions. Thank god for that! Imagine we would never experience happiness, love, joy, or pride! What a sad existence that would be. But with these positive emotions also come the ones that aren’t as pleasant or simply devastating. Breakups are hard, there is no question about it. Mostly because, we have a hard time accepting negative emotions, being patient with ourselves, and changing our perspective. As high-value women who are fully in our feminine energy it is especially hard to lose the person we have nurtured, loved and shared our lives with. As women are very emotional beings, our emotions can often take over, and losing the man who used to ground us and give us emotional stability can feel extremely painful, because we feel unsafe and lost. But as a high-value woman it is also our duty to deal with life challenges in a graceful and composed manner. We have to reconnect with our inner strength and remember that an end is always a new beginning. A door closing can mean a hundred new doors opening for us. But we have a hard time letting go of the familiar, of the comfort zone we have worked on building so hard, of the cozy and easy of a relationship even if it wasn’t serving us anymore.
2. Losing self-esteem and facing rejection.
Let’s be honest. Getting rejected is extremely hard, especially if it is by the person you love. Rejection from anyone can have a serious negative effect on our feelings of self-worth and self-esteem, it is simply devastating. We feel that we are not worthy of love, and that we are just not enough. Breakups are so hard on us because we feel we are losing a part of ourselves, especially those amongst us who built our whole lives around our partners. Why is this always happening to me? Why am I never good enough? I will never find a lasting relationship. These are just some of the things we tell ourselves that make accepting and moving on from a break up as hard. Even for the person who decided to end the relationship, it is often very painful: ” I ended the relationship but it still hurts”, is a phrase we often hear them say. And of course that is normal too! Why wouldn’t it be devastating for them too? They have the same memories, investments, and emotions that they have to let go off. Breakups are never easy and that includes the person who decides to leave.
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3. You don’t take responsibility
Being a victim and licking our wounds is only healthy for a certain amount of time. It always takes two to tango! There are a lot of factors that determine whether or not a relationship can work and be successful, but it is never just one person’s responsibility, after all, you both made the conscious choice to be a couple, and both of you have the right to decide not wanting to be in that relationship anymore. If we keep blaming the other person (even if they may have hurt us) that is not going to make things any better, and it is certainly not what a high-value woman who is aware of her worth does. Breakups are never easy but denying any responsibility or self-reflection will just harm us in the long term, as the probability of attracting the same kind of partner or making the same mistakes all over again will be high.
4. Daily routines after a breakup change
Being in love with a person, spending a big part of your time with them, sharing friends and common activities, and building a common social network is certainly a source of many positive emotions. It’s only natural that when all these things we have built together as a couple come to an end we feel deep grief and sadness. A breakup can feel like a big cut not only in our hearts but also in our reality. Suddenly the person we were around 24/7 isn’t part of our lives anymore, and our day-to-day changes drastically which can leave us feeling overwhelmed and anxious. It is devastating and breakups are hard because they involve a big push out of our comfort zone and often come with huge challenges, especially if families and children are involved.
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5. Breakups are hard especially because we might still love the person.
The first law of conservation of energy says that energy is neither created nor destroyed. So if love is an energy, how can anyone just suddenly expect us to stop loving someone? We often hold on for dear life to that love we feel, as it reminds us of better times, and makes us feel less lonely. Energy can not be destroyed but it can be transformed and redirected, that’s why the biggest poets and artists often use the pain of heartbreak to create the most spectacular songs or pieces of art that touch our souls. So if we don’t try to let go and use our pain and love to build something more constructive than just losing ourselves in sadness, we will be having a hard time moving on.
So what can high-value women do to get over a breakup more easily? Here are a few tips:
- Let yourself grieve! It’s ok to be sad, and any high-value woman who doesn’t just jump from one relationship to another deserves to go through a phase of sadness. Be kind to yourself and be patient with your emotions.
- Surround yourself with good people who lift you up and change your perspective.
- Try new activities in order to reconnect with yourself and get to know yourself better.
- Journal, dance or paint to process your emotions.
- Distance yourself from your ex partner in order to heal. The power of silence after a breakup shouldn’t be ignored!
- Take care of your body and mental health.
- Start a new project, work on your dreams.
- Only open yourself up for new people and a new love when the time is right.
This post was all about breakups are hard.
