In this post, you will learn what kills relationships, enabling you to recognize potential threats right away and work towards a fulfilling and healthy long-term relationship.
This post is all about what kills relationships
Most of you would have heard of the 4 horsemen criticism, contempt, stonewalling, and defensiveness that often make relationships fail. In this post, we explore other potential threats to your couple, so you know what kills relationships immediately and help you build a loving and long-lasting relationship with your partner. So let’s dive into the top 10 things that destroy relationships.
What kills Relationships
1. Unrealistic Expectations Fueled by Social Media
Social media has definitely taken a toll on modern dating and relationships. If asked the question: ” what kills relationships?”, many of you will confidently say social media. Not only do Instagram and all these other platforms make us believe that the grass is always greener on the other side, but they also give us very unrealistic expectations of what a good partner should be and look like. Social media often creates a distorted image of relationships by highlighting only the best moments. Constant exposure to picture-perfect couples can lead to unrealistic expectations, causing dissatisfaction in your relationship. When partners start to compare their relationship to these idealized versions, it can create unnecessary pressure, resentment, and disappointment.
2. Emotional Unavailability or Avoiding Vulnerability
Being emotionally unavailable is one of the top 10 things that destroys relationships. Being in a partnership requires both parties to let their guard down, open up, and be courageous enough to be vulnerable with each other. While this can be scary, it’s necessary to build a healthy and fulfilling relationship that goes beyond being a simple transaction to satisfy our needs. Emotional unavailability is one of the most common reasons for breakups because without true intimacy you can’t build trust and the partnership will feel superficial.
3. Lack of Playfulness or Spontaneity
Breakup signs are numerous but a lack of playfulness is definitely one of them. Couples who are in love, enjoy each other’s company, explore life together and love being playful. If there is no room for adventure and play, a relationship often stagnates, and people lose interest. If a couple gets stuck in routine without engaging in lighthearted moments, the relationship can feel more like a chore than a joyful partnership, leading to boredom and disconnection.
4. Refusing to Apologize or Admit When Wrong
A lack of accountability isn’t only super unattractive and immature but is what destroys relationships. In a partnership, there will always be conflict, misunderstanding, and problems to solve. Therefore being a team that supports each other, where both parties take responsibility for their actions and apologise for their mistakes, is essential for a long-lasting and healthy relationship.
5. Ignoring the Importance of Shared Experiences
Trying new activities and sharing experiences is huge for the health of a relationship. New experiences help us to stay curious and excited about our partners, help us bond, and build meaningful memories. Remember, that a relationship takes work and investment of time and energy from both sides. Just like you wouldn’t expect a business to be successful if you only put in minimum effort, a relationship won’t thrive if you aren’t willing to go the extra mile.
6. Holding on to Past Hurts or Grudges
Not being able to forgive and building resentment is what kills relationships slowly but almost definitely. If you keep fighting over what happened 2 years ago and don’t communicate and resolve issues it will hinder you from growing and healing in your relationship. Therefore it’s essential to address things that hurt you and try to resolve problems in a healthy and productive way. Remember that the perfect partner or relationship doesn’t exist, it’s all about being respectful and trying to build a life as a team and not as competitors.
7. Excessive Need for Control or Micromanaging
Controlling and jealous behaviors are amongst the top 10 things that destroy relationships. Opening up to someone and letting them into your life and heart takes a lot of courage and makes us vulnerable, however, that doesn’t give us the right to control our partners. They are adults with their own lives and routines, and we need to respect that and trust they don’t want to do us any harm. Of course, this is easier said than done when we have been hurt or betrayed in the past. But we need to understand that our partner isn’t responsible for our past or our emotions. Giving each other space to follow hobbies and passions, and nurture friendships as individuals is crucial for a healthy and mature relationship.
8. Letting Routine and Boredom Take Over
Nothing destroys relationships more slowly than routine and boredom. The lust for novelty and excitement is amongst the most common reasons for breakups. We all crave to feel desired, to have butterflies in our stomachs once in a while and just simply feel alive. Once we are stuck in a routine, where no one makes an effort with each other anymore, people start to seek excitement outside of the relationship. Therefore it’s crucial to make an effort, plan fun activities, try new things, travel, and explore all that life has to offer together.
9. Avoiding Difficult Conversations for Fear of Conflict
Conflict is a natural part of any relationship, but avoiding difficult conversations because of a fear of confrontation can cause problems to fester beneath the surface. When issues aren’t addressed head-on, they can grow into bigger problems, leading to resentment or miscommunication which is one of the top 10 things that destroy relationships. Open, honest discussions are essential for resolving issues and building trust, and avoiding them only delays the inevitable and damages the relationship in the long run.
10. Constantly Comparing Your Relationship to Others
I said it before and I will say it again, there is no such thing as the perfect couple. How other couples present themselves can be very misleading, as they always show the best side, and don’t necessarily talk about their everyday struggles! Comparing your relationship to others is an absolute waste of time, and only breeds resentment and the feeling of somehow being inadequate or not good enough. Try to cherish your partner, focus on the positives, and try to work on the areas where you need to improve. Use other couples as a role model in areas where you feel you need to grow but don’t fall into the trap of idealizing other relationships!
If you spot any of the above relationship killers in your couple. don’t panic. Not all of them must be breakup signs, but look at them as areas for growth in your couple. Take on the challenge to eliminate what kills relationships and enjoy building a healthy and long-lasting partnership with your other half.
This post was all about what kills relationships.
